Child sexual abuse is one of the most heinous crimes. Childhood is considered an era of carefree innocence. Instead, it is a nightmare for many children. The World Health Organization (WHO) defines child abuse and child abuse as physical or emotional abuse, sexual abuse, neglect or negligent treatment or occupational or other abuse that results in actual or potential harm to a child's health. is.
Sharing a story of sexual abuse isn't easy
The sad reality is that there are millions of child abuse cases reported every year around the world and many more that go unreported for various reasons. One such case is of Neha, an IT professional whom I have known since childhood. I was hesitant at first to reveal the details of his horrific experiences. I was worried it might trigger those memories but she is more than willing to share her story, even if she hasn't spoken about her experiences before, not even to her friends or family.
Neha is the only child of working parents, who used to leave her with grandparents while going to work. She was about 6 years old when she was playing in her neighbor's house with her friend of the same age. Neha says, “My friend's elder brother (around 10 years old) locked me inside and made me dirty while persuading me to hide in his room. He took advantage of the opportunity and sexually assaulted me.
A few years later a man living in the same building in his own apartment, whose younger brother had befriended him. He stopped her on the ladder at night and molested her. "I had no one to believe" Neha says, “At that time I felt violated and scared but could not understand what was happening to me. It was only after several months that I realized that this was wrong, yet I feared the consequences for my abusers as well. It is the fact that I did not maintain good relations with my parents, they have made the situation worse." She adds, “He was also possessed with his marital and career related problems to meet my emotional needs. I didn't have anyone to confide in and felt the people who should have protected me and fought for me. I felt lonely and ignored instead of my cheerful, talkative self so I started falling back into my shell."
When I heard his experiences, I was glad that his parents were oblivious to his misery. It was heartbreaking about a little girl who should have been heard. As a society we have failed in this. Every so often, a child is being abused and there is no one to support them, we must question ourselves.
A child's first aid system is supposed to be their parents but when they are not around or they are the perpetrators, the onus is on extended family, teachers and close friends. This is where awareness about child sexual abuse is important.
It was definitely a conscious call for me, to realize that Neha's parents, whom I had known for years and were kind, had done such a gruesome thing to her. I felt like I had let him down as a friend because I never realized the extent to which he was affected.
It is also necessary to eliminate the effects of child sexual abuse
She was almost 20 when Neha was finally going to therapy and dealing with her problems. Although 'Never Late Say Never' is certainly true especially in such cases, the sooner it is dealt with, the better. I even learned that she struggled with depression for most of her life and at one point even contemplated suicide. In her case the effect was more emotional.
प्रतीकात्मक तस्वीर। फोटो साभार: pixabay
She carried those emotional traumas throughout her life and is still struggling to deal with it after that. While abusive incidents were the main issue, I believe the constant neglect by her parents was also her lifelong discomfort with men. Child abuse does not discriminate on the basis of gender, social standing, ethnicity or religion. This is a global issue and every one of us should make efforts to end child abuse in the world. Let us first start with our family and help. Raise kids who won't have to recover from their childhood.
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(With input from news agency language)
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